Putin calls Russian prostitutes “best in the world”

Reacting to allegation that Russian spies collected compromising material on President-elect Donald Trump during a visit to Russia during the 2014 Winter Olympics, Russian President Vladimir Putin made a very interesting state statement to reporters today.

First Putin said the allegations that Trump hired prostitutes to urinate on a bed once used by President Barak Obama were “obvious fabrications.”

“People who order fakes of the type now circulating against the U.S. president-elect, who concoct them and use them in a political battle, are worse than prostitutes because they don’t have any moral boundaries at all,” Putin told reporters in the Kremlin on Tuesday, according to Bloomberg.

Reports are worse than prostitutes. Okay sure. Why not? But Putin had much to say on the issue.

He added that Trump is “a grown man, and secondly he’s someone who has been involved with beauty contests for many years and has met the most beautiful women in the world.”

Okay. So the implication is, we suppose: why would Trump pay for sex, when he has a harem of beauty queens he can abuse and manipulate? Good point.

But that’s not all! Putin slipped in one more line that we’re just sure will be a boon to the Russian National Tourist Office.

“I find it hard to believe that he rushed to some hotel to meet girls of loose morals, although ours are undoubtedly the best in the world.”

There you have it, right from the horse’s mouth! Russian prostitutes — i.e. “girls of loose morals” because you wouldn’t want to offend the hookers — are the BEST IN THE WORLD.