Beware: luxe hotels can apparently be deathtraps for young’uns

One affluent mommy has recently taken to Town & Country to lament the dangers of staying in high-end hotels. Apparently they are far more dangerous to young’uns than your average Motel 6.

She highlights how once in a five-star resort, Junior took to playing around with a bulky dresser and ended up tipping the bureau, inducing a large-screen plasma tv to topple. While thankfully the tyke was unharmed, ye gads! How ever did these one percenters get through the rest of their vacation without the ability to Netflix and chill?

With a clear case of PTSD, the diligent mom became hyperaware of all the danger that lurks behind gilded doors.

At another uber-expensive property, her Dennis the Menace made straight for the delicate candy-colored glassware and shiny coffee maker. In yet another resort, paper thin wine glasses lay in wait to entice her toddler.

[Pro-tip: perhaps vacation a little less to minimize such prevalent dangers.]

She ultimately came to the conclusion that the poors simply have a safer go of it in their low rent digs. Because what are a few bed bugs and shifty characters compared to a heavy carved wooden dresser….

“The furnishings may be frumpy, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing: those beefy, round-cornered dressers designed for hotel use are practically tip-proof. In more modest rooms, I don’t need to shoo my children away from juliet balconies, articulated brass lamps, or crystal paperweights,” she concludes.

The struggle is certainly real. What’s a mom to do when she wants to lay upon 1000-thread count linens and a crystal vase threatens to ruin all that? Sadly, this mom has learned what many others before her have, that kids are the reason we simply can’t have nice things. [T&C]